Thursday, October 31, 2019

Love Blog Story

I believe there are different kinds of love, we have family love, inanimate love, forced love, superficial love and true love. Most of the time we are in one specific kind of love and your partner might be feeling a completely different type of love. Does that mean there's incompatibility? Well sure but incompatibility has to do more with connection and personality. When there's love there's reliability. Worry-free situations. Stress-free living. When there's love, there's care, dependability, selflessness. So many good positive feelings.

When you meet the right person you click with that person. You're ultimately in sync. Always on the same page. Sometimes it is very obvious that you both feel the same way and other times only one person. Knowing you wanna spend the rest of your life with somebody instantly, is sometimes a sign of true love, you don't care what is at risk because the end result is very much worth it. 

Superficial love almost always has to do with physicality, a different mentality of "quick". It could be passionate but being superficial with love always runs dry. Friends with benefits is a good example. There might be an attraction but no mental connection there. Bodies connected but mind and soul left out.

True love is built on three major things, essential into making the relationship work. Honesty, trust and faith. These three things always co-depend into one another.
The beginning of this blog was written on September 23-24th almost more than a month ago. I feel the exact same way I did before and the truth is I've never realized how true my second paragraph is. I know it was out there, I know it was rare, and for anybody, even for me to find it is extremely special.

I still have my deep psychological fears. Fears that might not even matter but to some degree they impact me. We see many but many relationships not working out. People say you should always work hard to making it work but that's the thing maybe the two of you aren't really a good pair, maybe, in reality, it never really works out no matter how hard you try. Maybe I have a bad perspective but it seems like people that try the hardest at making it work are the most unhappy, we have to learn to move on. Try again. Walk a different path, re-connect differently and find another essence.

Love can be simple, love can be complicated but love is never blind. 

Wednesday, September 4, 2019

Septiembre por Siempre

The following blog is completely in spanish so, turn your google translate on or get your spanish friend to translate *insert thumbs up emoji here* whispers *or read another blog*

Ya llego el septiembre y este blog va a ser completamente en español. Porque? Nada mas por que quice y porque tengo el control superior de este universo, de lo que se aprueba y de lo que corre aqui en hos blogs. Yo soy el señor boss. Talvez te preguntas, wow este we no sabe escribir ni de chiste, es porque es cierto. Te lo prometo que no e buscado o translado nada hasta este punto ni el resto del blog. Como lo sabras que es cierto?....pos porque te lo estoy dicendo no?.... Este blog va a ser raw. No tengo idea como se dice raw, por el momento le diremos un blog sin cocer. Como un chicken nugget rosita.

Despiertenme cuando el septiembre se acabe..... chingados. Que te hizo el septiembre que quieres que se valla a la fregada. Septiembre es el puente que conecta el verano y el invierno (tome cinco minutos tratando de recordar como traducir winter, no queria hacer trampa y estuve con las ganas de googlear). Septiembre no se considera otoño y tampoco verano. Es oficialmente el mes del huracan. El mes donde todo se aloqueza. El mes del chaos y es por eso que Billie Joe ya no quizo saber nada de septiembre. Septiembre primero, 1982 es el dia que su padre murio, Billie nada mas tenia 10 años. En el funeral de su padre Billie corrio a su casa para encerrarse en su cuarto con llave.

El septiembre el tiempo de reconciliacion, de poder ver y comprender. Ver ojo a ojo con alguien mas. Si noviembre es el mes de accion de gracias, yo declaro septimbre de accion de restauracion. Para poder restaurar relaciones o poder restaurar tu estado mental, emocional y hasta fisico. El mes numero 7, el mes de suerte pero tambien de sabiduria y confianza. Septiembre es el balance perfecto para la transicion de temporadas. El reflejo perefecto de marzo y en ciertos lugares abril.

Para informarles uno de los dias oficiales de spetiembre mas anticipado es el dia de hablar como un pirata: septiembre 19. Este dia es un dia reconocido en E.U que hasta Obama lo habia celebrado en 2012. Todo el dia tienes que usar terminos de pirata. No te confundas con ver una pelicula pirata y decir que fuiste a celebrar el dia. No seas pirata ese tipo de pirata todavia es ilegal amigos. Septiembre tambien tiene el dia de abuelitos, cuando te conviertes abuelito puedes celebrar tu dia como 3 veces: tu cumpleaños, dia del padre/madre, y dia del abuelito. Y si crean dia de viejito, tambien cuenta. Dia de retirarte, dia de la salud pobre, dia de el ciego; deberiamos de tener dias para apreciar las gentes que no son reconocidas como dia del perro o si no dia de la suegra o suegro. Nose.

Lo que si se es que no puedo deletrear septiembre.....sin TI. Estaria muy solo, seria sepembre.
Buena ya los dejare ir, pero de verdad, despiertienme cuando se acabe el presente del septiembre.

Aqui dejo el video de green day por si lo han visto o por si nada.
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Wednesday, August 28, 2019

Life is a balance

There is always a medium, a middle ground, a counterweight or practically a balance from everything we do, see or even feel. From the most basic, obvious qualities of life to the most obscure insecurities we posses. There's always that balance in life that tends to correct itself. Seasons are the land's balance between too hot and too cold. I feel we sometimes don't understand how perfect our world sometimes is, sure we as a population hurt the earth more than we should but the earth seems to be catching up and adapting in certain ways. There is an article listed by the NY Times by David Biello titled "We aren't destroying the Earth" where he talks about how nature is more complicated than we think, more species arise faster then old ones extinct. We fail to understand how nature is rapidly developing, we focus too much on the history of certain species that we fail to see the new biodiversity that blossoms from the surprisingly hotter atmosphere, such as new plant life.

There's more balance to life than we see or realize. Darkness and light; hot temperatures and cold ones; young and old. These are some of the most basic ones, but we can also mention a more philosophical approach. When we are at our lowest in life, depressed, nowhere to go, homeless, lost someone, lost a job etc. whatever it may be that puts you at our very lowest, that's when life corrects itself. You somehow end up bouncing back up most of the time, sort of like a rollercoaster: it goes all the way down but always manages to ride back up again. Life is truly a rollercoaster. You hop into life, it has it's ups and downs, some more violent than others, but eventually, it comes to an end. I've noticed a trend, for a lack of a better word, that when someone close passes away, somehow new life always follows shortly after. Sort of as if the amount of life balances out in the family. Although very subjective, it also seems to apply when people leave certain relationships in their life, people always find others. A balance.

Now is correction a balance? Who is to say one extreme is not normal? That is the beauty of life, it's sustainable. Our body is also a balance, for as much physical activity we do, our body also requires sleep to re-energize and rebalance our mind. Our body heals when it is cut. When it is cold, our body tends to retain more body heat in our core and vice-versa, we require rehydration when we release too many fluids. Maybe it is not a correction but a form of replenishment of life, a restoration.

The happiest people tend to be the most depressed people. Once our body, mind or soul go through one extreme of reality it's also likely to visit the other extreme in the spectrum. Wether in wealth, lifestyles, health etc anything that can experience extreme joy or extreme sadness. We have to learn to appreciate the balance of good and bad, we have to understand that perhaps nothing is truly good nor bad but two different extreme lifestyles that make people unaccepting of others. Such as a person deep into their religious or cultural roots vs someone who spends all day practicing their screeches for a metal band. They might not understand each other but there is always a middle ground to cope with one another. That's why there is debates, wars, arguments, even deaths, all because we don't want to see eye to eye. Not accepting different perspectives or ways of life, we are stubborn to think that there is only OUR way to live or thrive. But whether we see it or not, the other side of the spectrum is always present, maybe not in the visible present that we live in, but out there.

Let me know what you think on this topic of overall balance in the comments below. On a side note, I recommend watching "one strange rock" hosted by will smith on netflix.

Wednesday, August 14, 2019

El Paso Massacre

August 3rd, 2019. Around early 10:00 am at El Paso, Texas. I worked early that day until 3:00 PM. I received the news from friends first. At first, it seemed it was a lousy joke but no. Terror actually hit. "Active shooter at Cielo Vista Mall". The message turned my blood upside down. Around 10:20 am, the news got worse. There were multiple rumors that there were multiple shooters attacking several different malls. This is when we all got worried.

Rumors everywhere, texts being sent out, calls being made. Social media being part of the problem, spreading incorrect information causing chaos and ultimately panic. 3 shooters are out and about, unconfirmed reports of shootings in the area. 10 people dead. 15, 17, 18 dead. "Area is still active" is what was reported by the Police department. That lasted for hours until around 2 PM.

I called my mom and asked her where she was, and informed her that there was an active shooter near our house. She confirmed she was inside ordering her Herbalife shake/tea. I asked her where my sister was, and she replied she was at work (in the far east, far from where it took place). I then asked about her boyfriend since I knew he was staying with us for a couple of days. He confirmed he was ok.

My work suddenly got more intense. We closed the front gate halfway for pre-caution, but we were still open at the time. Videos and images spread online. It drowned all social media outlets, at this point the incident had gone national. And everyone, everywhere in North America knew about what had just occurred. At this point, horror was still spreading since there was no confirmation that the suspect was caught or how many there were. The time was 11:30 am. People in my workplace were listening to the videos that people had spread online. Those videos were real. Gory, bloody, fear, gunshots, screaming, those videos were too much to even listen to, it actually made emotional just thinking about my own family being in that wal-mart. I then made my way to the back area (at work) to recover myself. Stupid messages were being spread that mentioned "my brother's uncle is in the FBI.....and that the attack was affiliated with gang activity.....which may be part of a re-occuring event.....etc.LIES, ALL OF THEM. I know we, as people that live in this town want to be careful, but COME ON! The first couple of people that started it must have just sent it to spread panic. All you saw on facebook/insta/messages was "Not sure if real but just in case"....If it's not reliable, why post it? I guess out of precaution and fear to stay away from commercial centers.

The Cielo Vista mall and Bassett Center malls were quickly evacuated, some stores stayed locked inside (with customers) for hours until they got the word that it was safe. Policemen and Army affiliates were running down the mall with the big guns, literally marking the stores with a black marker "Cleared P.D" on the stores' windows. Back at work, we all turned on the news to know what exactly was happening. But the worst part was that nobody knew what was happening. Nobody wanted to confirm anything. Random official reports were coming in, which worsened the situation. Not until 1/2 PM we started to see the shooter's face from the store cam. The image was later confirmed to be true. As well as his capture later on. The arrest was made on the intersection I used on the daily. Where I turn to go home, go to work, see friends, buy food and even go to walmart. The Viscount/Sunmount intersection. The image caused some controversy since it seemed the capture was TOO peaceful for a massacre of him harming 46+ people.

Hours after the event, people (by the masses) lined up for blood donations. Even in our sister city Las Cruces, NM. So many people had gone to the blood drives that people had to be turned away. People wanted to help so bad, and everybody could feel the love, giving water, food ANYTHING to see those that were damaged getting the help they needed.

The balcony from my house could see the aftermath still, Police everywhere and people visiting the area (since they set up a mourning site for them right before an intersection before entering walmart). The following nighr, people gathered at a nearby park to mourn and remember, to recollect what had happened.
Days have passed, today is August 14th, our city is still greatly affected by what had happened. Someone from out of town, driving hours from Allen, TX to cause major harm. Beautiful things has happened since. People are coming together to mourn. Lady gaga got involved to fund our people, Khalid is returning to have a benefit show as well as local places by local bands contributing for the families affected. Personally, my band, had a show on August 9th and we were able to raise ($600+) (and depending on how much the bar gave extra). We personally received the 600 dollar check only to turn it in COMPLETELY. All of us felt great about that. To this day the walmart is still closed and just a couple days ago they started letting people pick up their cars from the lot. They had fenced the scene completely where the parking lot is.

To this day people are scared, shook. Going around the malls recently, there are definitely fewer people than normal. People have lost trust. Others unaffected but the majority still psychologically damaged still. You can't simply forget. I heard a comment the other day by a little girl that had said "I'm still scared of being in a place like this", they were at the mall in the westside of the city. When the news broke, national news had gotten misinformed and thought the shooter was at the Cielo Vista mall when in fact, nothing had occurred there. That day my little sister and mom were going to head to walmart AT THAT SPECIFIC TIME, even had a friend that was supposed to buy packs of water in the morning as well. They both had plan changes and did not end up going to walmart that morning. But to think my family and friends dying is an unthinkable thought. El Paso is still safe. El Paso people are still here, we are strong defintely

22 people dead, 24 injured. Our president visited. Controversy surrounded that.

A massacre.

In my own backyard.

I'm ultimately still shook.

But not scared anymore.

Saturday, August 3, 2019


The right way to do something is subjective is it not? If someone has been doing a certain procedure for a long period of time, why does it become normalized for everybody?  Nobody dares to question the status quo. Nobody wants to come first to challenge an elder or a system of old ideas. Say you did dare to speak up, but you are instantly shut down by the majority, do you dare to give it a second try or does it ultimately become the system's fault at that point. If the standards work why challenge it? Effectivity could increase, the speed could increase, productivity overall changes for the better.

People are stuck in their comfort zone. No change, no range, no exchange or ways to arrange paths to be free or explore different areas of interest/ideas. We have to rewire our brain to think differently, to be different, to be out there. Not necessarily about commitment or consistency but about becoming someone unafraid of change, unafraid of life standards or transitions. 

Talking about standards, we can all agree that most people drive automatic cars. Now the standard for standard cars was the status quo. Someone out there challenged how standard vehicles worked/functioned (quick research: 1932 two Brazillian engineers that called it: Hydro-Matic engine) These folks perfected the idea of a clutch-less transmission, an idea that was already presented and miserably failed because of the abruptness of gear changes, models that were presented in the earlier 1900s. These ideas were quickly shut down. People had already challenged the standard. And it took decades for auto manufacturers to accept the other idea. Why did the standard not changed then, lack of technology? fear? distrustfulness of people who had presented failed ideas? A new standard for the standard vehicles was introduced to a standard that became automatic which is ironic because standard vehicles were once the standard but now are not. Wow, that is a mouthful. 

I think there are standards everywhere, in beauty, in education, in socialism, in our homes. Don't get me wrong maybe some standards are good, washing your hands before going to the restroom is not as effective as washing after. But there are some standards that seem unnecessary, companies sell you beauty but why do their perspective on beauty seem selective? Perhaps it is because it sells, as we all know sex sells. Proven to be a fact, in terms of business aspects. But is the society the one that is controlling the media or is the standard of businessmen and companies the ones enforcing the same ideals to the masses over and over again? us or them? The one in power holds the key to change. But also the people have the power to dethrone those in power, able to de-collapse their systems. But that takes many collective minds to drive a force to do something as powerful. 

Maybe standards are meant to be challenged at their respective time and place. Things are meant to be a certain way until their expiration or renovation comes in. Social standards are probably the hardest ones to overcome, we're too afraid of making eye contact or too afraid to be the first to speak up sometimes. Let's change that, let's be the first to break free from norms, be the first to challenge the way things work, to introduce ourselves.

Maybe standards are there to keep us in check, whether for safety or because it is truly the only way. If we all see something new the same way for a long time, does it transform to a standard? That's a possibility.

I've officially concluded, by my own state of mind, that standards are here to keep society in order. To keep the balance within the many clashing forces of the world: politics, different country, religions, cultures, social manners, habits, etc. Chaos occurs without systems, without established routes, without standards. But this does not mean we should keep the balance all the time.

Chaos Theory: A small change introduced in a system, in this case, a standard. That ultimately cause a huge difference in outcome after a long time. The effect can be positive or negative, I believe, and creates similar patterns that change over time sometimes unnoticed. Also called the butterfly effect, it seems like, even though the long-lasting change occurs, it seems it always corrects itself in the end. It balances out. It could be nature, it could be the way our world works, it could higher forcers working for us, but it always normalizes no matter how big of a change it is. Normal = the norm = standards = the way things are. Or seem to look like at the moment.

I have many thoughts. Just wanted to lay them all down, probably confusing as hell, but I guess that's how my head works. A big disorder of thoughts. Very random at times. I don't know how to end this pile of thoughts so yea that's it.




nothing here.

Wait if there is nothing is there anything? If there's nothing is there standards since there's no one? If only one person does something different is it never considered a standard?





Standards belong to the masses.



Saturday, July 27, 2019

A Mind for Peace of Mind

Are our minds connected with both mind and soul or are they all 3 different pieces of a whole? A whole that makes us who we humanly currently are? Sometimes my mind and body feels disconnected from my soul. I feel I'm walking around aimlessly in a loop with no sense of true ground. Sort of like when you wake up restlessly, and you end up feeling like a zombie, literally. Is my mind meant to be No words come out of you. No emotion shows. No physical reaction. A whole lot of nothing. Why? why does it feel like that sometimes? I tried coffee and energy drinks but that seems to only affect my body more than the true mind. Sleep more? Yea, I'm not much of a morning person, so the energy is just transplaced at a later moment only to exert it as a zombie.

I realized one way my body, mind, and soul kinda feels awake, and that's communication with another body, mind, and soul that truly wakes me from my zombie coma. Feels sort of like when you feel extremely tired and sleepy; you kinda just want to lay in bed and not do a single thing. But then a friend calls you to do something that involves you to have to move and drive, and possibly do physical exercise. As you meet with your friend to do whatever activity they had in mind, at that moment your tiredness/sleepyness goes away. Instantly. At the end of the activity or the meet with your friend, you don't feel tired, it feels as if you got a reboot to your day. 

Human interaction goes a long way, an epiphany that I recently had. This ties to several thoughts in mind. I'm thinking for those that are depressed, close-minded, ill in some way. These 3 types of individuals and possibly many more are heavily affected by other individuals. 

People that are depressed have become single-minded, in a way that the same thought keeps coming back to them in a repeated loop whether it is about suicide, history with others, stress, blame etc. Once someone provides positive words, encouragement, solutions, generally good vibes, that sad individual starts changing his/her perspective for a different outlook on their situation. 

Close-minded people are usually around other close-minded people. Whether religious or simply not enough exposure to different sources of information/situations, it only takes one taste, one other thought, one other mind to introduce doubt to their close-mindedness. Even if it shows that the other person doesn't accept it right away. It will definitely be an introduction to begin wondering in their own mind what is right and what is wrong. Perhaps there is neither. Ethics and subjectivity begin to play a role here. 

Health plays a huge role when it comes to peace of mind (in my opinion)(Side note: everything is my opinion). I believe our body heals itself, just as it heals when we bruise/cut ourselves. The only exception would be when our mind is not on good terms with its body. There is a negative force in our mind that negatively starts affecting the body. Mood and attitude could play a role but I choose to believe that it is an action that carries the goodness of bad health. People that accept their bad health and say "I guess I have cancer" or "It is what it is" and see no way around is exactly the message that the body receives by the mind. I think it's as simple as that. When someone has accepted their bad health, other human thoughts can help his/her own mind decide what to do with his/her body. Thoughts and verbal words are more powerful than we think.

No one should be left alone with their own thoughts, our minds start to wonder. We need other human input, opinions, ideas, etc. Our collective minds seem to be one as a whole. Whether it is within a family or with friends. This reminds me of like when you get to a restaurant/fast food and it's empty, a couple of minutes go by and suddenly the place is full. Also when there are events, even if there's nothing to do at the event, people go where people are. We are attracted to one another in a mindful way. We enjoy the company of strangers more than being alone at a certain place.







I don't know

Thursday, July 25, 2019

A Blog about People

They're everywhere, at work, in your school, in the road and worst of all in your own home.
Honestly, you will always see people every day unless you're confined to a maximum-security prison in a 24 hour no light cell strapped to a straitjacket. We're all the same, truly, we eat, we work, we go home, we sleep, we poop (not together, preferably).

I think we need to re-evaluate how we see others. Especially our enemies, haters or people we despise. Because most likely our least liked person is just like us. We have to let go of our grudges, our own insecurities and co-exist peacefully with one another. Now you probably say: How the hell do I just let go of someone that cheated on me? Or Kicked me out of the house? Or even killed your very own goldfish cuz it looked like a floating goldfish snack? Easy. It's called forgiveness. Most likely some people are going to be very stubborn. It's a huge load off your back once you accept it, and just say it verbally. You stop carrying the worthless negativity load that brings you down each and every day.

People can suck don't get me wrong, but other people's business should not affect you personally. Unless of course it's some sort of bullying directed at you then you should probably get as far as hell from that person. Getting to the root of bullying, most of the time comes from social problems in the bully's life. Maybe it can be a chain of anger/bully that is being passed down. Maybe that person has a sibling/friend that treats him like garbage and so he carries that with him/her until he/she release that negativity unto someone else. Bad energy is just transferred elsewhere.

We, as a society, need good chains of positivity, happiness that you carry unto someone else. Once you do that, not only does it make that other person feel good but it also helps yourself as well.

But seriously if people just gave their enemies another perspective or opportunity to treat them differently, we would understand why they function the way they do.

Different personalities can clash hard sometimes but at the same time, different personalities can also be two perfect puzzle pieces that fit together to create something new. It's all about perspective and how you decide to look at a situation. It's always good to step outside that scenario and look at EVERYTHING from at 3rd person angle. Making sure that your ego (your own feelings/desires) is not involved in any way, meaning that you use your empathy towards the situation. We have to completely remove ourselves from the situation to have clarity. Not that we do not care about our wants or emotions but for an understanding to find a solution to the problem towards that other person. Whether it is something dramatic or something unforgivable, I believe your spiritual self needs the healing to move on. Your mind, body, and soul need to find the solution.

As a person, be happy and spread happy.
I'll leave you with these videos.

That I found awhile back

Monday, July 15, 2019

Bring back Blogging 2019

Holy balls, you are actually reading this, and I am actually typing this.
This definitely brings back some sort of nostalgia when you think about early
web design and utility. I had an epiphany guys, I actually enjoy writing more than I thought.

Thank you for coming into my blog and checking it out, I want to make it super cheesy and entertaining as possible but at the same time there's gonna be rants and informational ones too. Topics that should be addressed and my thoughts/ideas. I want this to be a back and forth kind of thing so definitely let me know your thoughts as well!

You have officially finished two paragraphs from a blog, welcome to 2002 stranger, you are officially a time traveler and friend. Feel free to travel back in time with me as I'll update weekly from the future. Here's a food for thought if every single human on earth travels to the past, are we in the present or still considered the past? idk

Well I'm gonna keep it short

Real short for this one

And don't you





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